The day before our wedding, later Friday morning, Austin had to leave Oro Valley and head back up to help out with everything in Gilbert. The last thing he said was that he would see me at the temple the next day. It didn't hit me then, but at the same time struck a cord with me. We had finally made it. We were going to be sealed to each other and to God for eternity the next day. All of the sacrifices and the time and effort we had made into putting God first were not in vain. Even though at times for the both of us we had lost hope and wondered whether or not we would ever find the one we wanted to be with forever, we held on and were blessed beyond measure to find each other. It truly was in our best interest and in God's perfect timing. Everything from the beginning testified of that over and over again. I have never seen things fall into place like they have for Austin and I. God truly led us to each other and is continually guiding us to where He needs us to be. It's absolutely incredible to witness that.
Even before the day of, but especially the morning of our wedding, I felt nothing but utter peace mixed with excitement. There were times when I was nervous, like when I showed up at the temple and Austin wasn't there, but overall I was just so ready to marry Austin and be his for eternity. While on that subject let me just add that although I acknowledge that Austin is not perfect and that neither am I, we have managed to find something incredible special. I would even dare to say that we are perfect for each other. Yes, he gets on my nerves as much as anyone who's family to me, but there is something about him where every single time I look at him, whether he's looking back at me or not, where I just get an overwhelming sense of gratitude wash over me for the man that he is and the man that he will continue to become. He is truly one of the most amazing people I have ever met in my life. I love him with my whole heart and soul, literally everything in me. I am blessed beyond measure to be his wife. He inspires me to be better each and every day whether he realizes it or not.
And that's really what it comes down to. There are no soul mates. There is not one single person that is absolutely perfect for you in every single way and because of that you will never fight or have problems. No, rather, there are imperfect people that will cross your path and honestly, it could work out with any of them, but one will stay and will make everything make sense. And all of the sudden all of the little things and the details won't matter anymore because it just all boils down to the fact that you want to be with them and that's all that matters. And I think that's just how God meant for it to be. He doesn't want us psychoanalyzing every person we meet in order to find the perfect one. He wants us to find that someone who will work every day to improve their imperfections and to help the both of you come closer to Him, and eventually return back to His presence. That's all He really wants for us. And that's what I found with Austin.
Waiting in the recorder's office I actually got a little nervous and I'm not sure why. Maybe it's cause I didn't want to embarrass myself or mess up or something, I don't know. But as I sat there with Austin in the Celestial Room in the temple, we both looked at each other to speak at the same time and realized we were remembering the same thing. Four months ago when Austin came to meet my family over Christmas break I took him to the Gilbert temple. After our session we sat on the couch underneath the mirror and I turned to him and said that the next time we would be in there we would be getting sealed. It was an incredible moment for us to recognize how prophetic that statement was and how hard we had worked to get there. We were then escorted to meet our sealer, Neal Christensen. He took some time to talk to us and get to know us a little bit before he brought us into the sealing room. Although we don't know each other very well, I'm so grateful that he was so close to the spirit to receive the inspiration that we needed to hear that day.
Our sealing was absolutely beautiful. Austin and I cried through the whole thing. Austin started pretty much as soon as we walked in, but I got extremely overwhelmed looking out at all of our family and friends that were able to there. We are so blessed to have such amazing family and friends that would sacrifice so much for us. And yes, it's an emotional day in general, but I think the both of us just felt the spirit testifying so strongly of Heavenly Father's love and approval of our making it to the temple and being sealed. I felt His presence as if He was my own father sitting in the witness chair feeling so proud of His daughter and her choices. The feelings I had are ones that will stick with me forever. The sealer talked a little about the ordinances that happen in the temple, the importance of them, and how we have a part in making sure they are done. He addressed those that were present and also just us as well. He talked about obedience and the importance of it as well. He talked about how obedience is what allowed Austin and I to be worthy to be there, and how we needed to continue to maintain that so that 20+ years down the road we can sit where our parents were sitting at our own children's sealings. He really was able to put everything into an eternal perspective for us as a new family and it was absolutely beautiful. I left with such a strengthened resolve to be the best wife and mother I could possibly be, in the Lord. Kneeling across the alter while holding hands with Austin really sank in the fact that I would finally get to keep him as my partner, my supporter, my lover, and my best friend forever. Those are tender moments I will never forget.
Everyone says that your wedding day is a blur and you'll hardly remember anything, but I remember everything. I remember what taking pictures outside the temple with our family and friends, and screaming babies was like. I remember the luncheon and how I was terrified I was going to spill something on my dress, but the food was so good! I remember how we were late to the reception because I needed to get my hair and makeup fixed and put that dang dress (I really do love it, but lacing it up takes forever!) back on again. I remember how the reception looked after countless hours and hours of work, and although I really could care less if we had all those decorations, I'm really glad we did it. I remember all the people I hugged and talked to, some of which I hadn't seen in forever and have missed dearly. I remember cutting the cake and having to get frosting out of my hair so I could dance. I remember dancing with my dad and watching him tear up when he listened to the lyrics of the song. I remember my first dance with my new husband and the overwhelming sense of love that washed over my body, and how in that moment, no one else mattered, it was just me and him. I remember all the little details, the songs, the candies, the dances. And most of all, I remember feeling so incredibly blessed and wondering what in the world I did to deserve all of it. You see, I etched it all out in my brain, every single detail, because I never want to forget how all of it felt. I never want to forget how I felt driving away that night looking at Austin, as my new husband, and feeling so ready to take on the world with him by my side.
Since then we have honeymooned in Cozumel, Mexico where our adventures together never stopped and where I realized that I honestly do not get sick of that handsome man. I miss him every second he's not with me, but I am grateful that he finally gets to come home to me. We have also made our way back to Rexburg where we have moved into our cute little apartment and although there is no space for anything else, I love that it's ours, and that's all that matters. I have also started my second to last semester of college (at least undergrad) and Austin has started working again. We have started our lives here together and are figuring out our routine. I used to be such a big planner and feel like I needed a strict schedule, but I have found that although we still have plans and goals, no matter what, with Austin by my side, it doesn't matter where we go or what we do. Being married to him has so far been the greatest blessing of my life. Adding him to my family and gaining his has been a blessing too. We are blessed beyond measure and every night before we go to bed we lay there and just talk about how crazy it is that our lives are so good. Sure, it's not always going to be like this, and of course trials are going to come, but I love going to sleep and waking up to my best friend every night and day. I love knowing that he will always be there for me to support and comfort me. Just this last Sunday he gave me a blessing before the new semester. Let me tell you, I love Father's Blessings, but getting a blessing from my husband has got to be one of the most spiritual and incredible experiences I have ever had. He promised me that this semester of school would be easy. That I would be able to do well and accomplish the things that I needed to. He said that I would be able to overcome the hard things that come my way and that I would feel comfort. He also reminded me that Heavenly Father loved me and was aware of me and the things I was going through. Having a worthy priesthood holder as my husband has already been such a blessing. So I guess to wrap up this ridiculously long post, I just needed to write down my thoughts and feelings of that incredible day and of my life so far with Austin. I love being married to him. I love being his wife and serving him, and although I know that things will change, I will make it my goal in life to make sure I always feel this way, if not stronger in love with him, forever. After all, it's only the start of forever right now :)
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